Pumpkin pie doesn't love me...

Thanksgiving food.

Those two words make your mouth water don't they? If not there's something wrong with you. Just saying.

I love Thanksgiving, I always have. I remember that day would come and I'd wake up to the glorious smells coming from the kitchen.You know the ones. I couldn't wait to pig out with my family and fall asleep on the couch. What thanksgiving is about right? Year after year I became so comfortable in that. Looking forward to that constancy. Knowing it would always be there, the same thing, just the way I loved it...every November.That special meal...That one you can have any day of the year but something about having it just on Thanksgiving day makes it more special, more amazingly delicious.

All things change though don't they? At least in some way.Thanksgivings have changed some over the last few years in our family. Extended families, coming and going, living in different states.

It also changed since I started to get sick a few years ago. There's certain foods I can't enjoy anymore, not the way I used to anyway.The pumpkin pie, the cheesy broccoli, the melt in your mouth yeast rolls... My three favorite things since I was a little butterball myself. The things I never thought twice about shoveling into my mouth I now cant enjoy the same way anymore. Without having a reaction to anyway. Stomach pains, muscle flareups, burning skin, just a few of the strange symptoms I get from eating certain foods. I never realized how much I took food for granted.

I have to admit the first year was hard, really hard knowing those foods I looked forward to and had become so accustomed to eating I wouldn't be able to anymore. My mom pulled out all the stops to make as close to everything as possible and it was amazing don't get me wrong, my mindset wasn't right though.There was still disappointment because that often happens with change doesn't it?

This year I'm actually thankful to be sick for Thanksgiving. No I haven't lost my mind....well not all the way. I'm thankful because it's the swift kick in the thanksgiving stretchy pants that I needed. It shifts my focus back to what's really important. It's not the food. Shocker I know. I'm not saying enjoying the food is a bad thing, it's not. But it shouldn't be the main focus.

Being sick actually makes me stop and think about the things I do have instead of what I don't. Crazy how that works. So this Thanksgiving I can't have regular pumpkin pie or broccoli so covered in cheese it makes it not healthy anymore. At least I can eat. At least I have food. So many people are so less fortunate than that.

And it reminds me the REAL reason why I love Thanksgiving, why I realize I've always loved Thanksgiving. Despite what may be different about the day, one thing has remained the same.  It's not because of what I'm eating but because the people I get to share it with.

I love everything about the day. I love seeing my mom in the kitchen selflessly cooking like she always has since the day I couldn't see over the counter. I love seeing my dad running around cracking jokes and trying to help but still stay out of my mom's way. I love seeing my beautiful sisters and their sweet husbands because no matter what distance separates us or how old we get it's like no time has passed.

I love looking over at my husband who said he'd be fine to have "Just one more roll" but is now passed out on my parents couch in a bread coma. Yes, I sure did call you out Jeremy Roth.

I love my family. We may look at things differently sometimes or had our disagreements over the years but I have never lacked love from them. I have that this Thanksgiving and I've had that every Thanksgiving before this. No matter what things change, that never does. I need to appreciate the people in my life more, not just on Thanksgiving but every day. Anything I don't or can't have doesn't compare to everything I do have. A love that never fades. God's love. His unconditional love shown through the people in my life. Let's face it, as much as I LOVE me some Pumpkin pie it's never loved me back.

Why Beauty Sucks

Beauty Sucks...

     We've all heard the statement Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.Something someone sees as beautiful someone else may see as not.

What is Beauty anyway? Real Beauty?

     We all have at least that one thing...that thing our eyes narrow in on when we stand in front of the mirror.That thing we wish we could change or try to cover up, convincing ourselves we'd be more beautiful, more desirable if we did. But by whose standards? Usually our own based on what society has drilled into our brains is "Beautiful". The magazines,commercials, billboards all portray ideas of what beauty is. If you wear this...you'll be beautiful. If you have this... then you'll be beautiful. If you look like this...you're beautiful....Trust me, as a photographer I know just what photo shop can do for a person...     

     
    
    Even at a young age girls are already striving to 'look prettier'. Desperately wanting approval and thinking they have to change who they are to be beautiful, to be accepted. Society and the media play on our insecurities. THAT is why Beauty sucks. Society's definition of Beauty. It sucks the life out of us, using all our energy and resources to reach the standards society has set for Beauty. But are they really to blame?

    We are so often our own worst critics aren't we? We look at ourselves so critically seeing ourselves one way and thinking others see the same. You know what I've learned is that most of the time the way we think people see us isn't at all how they do. The people that matter anyway. And at the end of the day how others see us isn't nearly as important as how we see ourselves.There are people in my life who I look at and I'm just amazed by.I see nothing but incredible beauty when I look at them and yet I know there are insecurities they deal with all the time.Things that make them see themselves as anything but the beautiful treasure they are.It breaks my heart because what they see as flaws to be fixed I see as beauty to be cherished. How can they possibly see themselves as anything but Beautiful? And then I think how often I've done the same thing to myself, Time and time again.

    Insecurities are a tricky thing. Sometimes we joke about them, try to deny them, or just try to hide them. We think our imperfections already stick out like a sore thumb so the last thing we want is to draw attention to them. We look at others thinking if I only had that body, that hair, that face I'd be happy...Id feel beautiful. All the while having no idea what insecurities that person faces themselves. Because lets face it, we all have them. I can promise you even the most confident woman has something about herself she struggles with. Comparison will steal our joy and our confidence every time. We so often base our worth on what we perceive to be true. Spending so much time focusing on our flaws that we miss embracing the things that make us one of a kind. 

     I think about the way God sees us. How he made us each so uniquely different with nothing but BEAUTY in mind. Knowing exactly how we'd look, right now, in this moment. He loves every single thing about us. Especially that thing you despise. You see, the truth is GOD DOESN'T MAKE JUNK. He doesn't mess up. He didn't make a mistake when he made your ears stick out a little more or your toes a little longer than every one else's.(me;) That makes you, YOU. No one else like you in the entire world. You're imperfections aren't something to be despised, they're things to be embraced. They make you rare, they make you Unique....and so Beautiful.

     Let's be real though, sadly there will always be people who try to bring you down. Most of the time to make themselves feel better. Often times hurt people want to hurt other people. So that person you come across that wants to point out your flaws is probably just facing insecurities of their own. Just smile and shake them off. You're fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator of the universe.You ARE Beautiful. Women need so desperately to hear and believe that, especially today. In a world where it's so important for us to set an example for the younger generations. To not just tell them but show them that they're beautiful just how they are.That there are people out there that will see them as a beauty to be cherished and they're worth waiting for. We all want to feel beautiful.So let's let go and focus on the things we do like rather than the things we don't.Let's try to see ourselves the way God does and help others to do the same.

It's time to embrace our imperfections...

Life is not a Snapshot

"He has made everything beautiful in His time.

He also set eternity 

in the human heart; 

yet no one can fathom what God has done 

from beginning to end." 

Ecclesiastes 3:11

I love being a photographer. Having the opportunity to capture moments in people's lives that will never happen again is such a rewarding privilege.

Our life is made up of it's own snapshots, some we long to cherish and some we cant wait to fade away. Moments both good and bad weave there way in out out of our lives on a daily basis.

We try desperately to hold on to the good, those moments that make us smile and bring us joy. Craving the snapshots that make us see our life as a Beautiful experience.

Then there are those moments that shake up our world causing our vision to blur and our beautiful outlook on life to become a distorted mess. It's easy to do in a world that's constantly throwing curve balls our way. Financial struggles, sickness, emotional hurt, daily demands in our jobs or relationships.

It's all a part of life, isn't it? But without the bad moments we wouldn't be able to truly appreciate the good moments. We wouldn't know what beauty was.


Every choice,every experience may lead us to where we are going but they don't define who we are.

The only thing that matters to God is who he is creating us to be. I love that about him! If we love him we can trust he's using all things in our lives,the beautiful and not so beautiful snapshots, to work together for our future good. He sees the potential of who we CAN be not who we used to be. 

Just because we may have a bad day, an off week, disappoint other people, make bad choices, or react poorly to things at times doesn't mean God is upset with us. Our mistakes are not our identity. Maybe in other people's eyes but not in God's. Through his amazing grace His view of us doesn't change in those bad moments.That's what our savior Jesus did for us.

One of my favorite songs says: "Life is not a snapshot,it might take a little time but you'll see the bigger picture...Because the pain that you've been feeling, it cant compare to the joy that's coming."

If we are in Christ all God sees when he looks at us is Beauty because only he can see the big picture.And he'll reveal it to us in his perfect time. In his eyes our life is more like a filmstrip than a snapshot. The things we face do not define us nor do we have to stay stuck in the rough spots or hold onto the ugly snapshots. Trust God with the good and bad moments. You are his beloved and nothing that happens day to day will make him see you any other way.

Prayer Starter: Dear God, I lay all the moments in my life at your feet, the good and bad. I trust that you are using them to mold me into the person you know I can be.In the challenging moments help me rest in knowing you're in control and only you can see the big picture.Help me to appreciate both the good and bad and find the beauty in every day.Thank you for this life.

Shrunken God

Have you ever tired to fit something in a place it didn't belong?

Let me tell you growing up as someone with hoarder-ish tendencies and a lack of and just right distaste for anything organization related....I was a shover....

I'd shove stuff here and shove stuff there, rarely in the right place, hoping that my attempt at "cleaning" my room would be sufficient.

When I look back now I think how much time I would have saved if I hadn't wasted the energy trying to fit things in places where they didn't belong.Especially since I couldn't find them later.I know mom, I know, You....were...riiiight.

How often do we do the same thing with God? How many times do we lose sight of how HUGE God is and try to shove Him in a box he was never meant to go in!Why are we so determined to serve a shrunken God?

Our human nature can be so logical sometimes can't it?We look at a situation and if we can't rationalize it or see any logical explanation or way out we think there isn't one and start to doubt. Doubt then leads to worry which leads us to fear causing us to live a life God never intended us to live!

We shrink God down to the point we can fit him in our neat little comfortable box.God has no restrictions in Himself but we give him restrictions within us.Which often leaves us stuck in the same circumstances,with the same struggles and fears but hey at least we're in control right?...or so we think.Why are we so often content with a mediocre life?

We dont think about the fact that by doing that we limit an unlimited God. We are putting restrictions on what we believe he can and can not do in our lives.

The bible says He is "able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think."Eph  3:20

I cant comprehend that verse and thats exactly why I love it!I don't know about you but I'd rather have a God I can't fully understand.A God that I can't shove into a box because he's just too dang HUGE for that. NOTHING is impossible for him, NOTHING is too Big.No restrictions,no limits.

It's not what we face in life that holds us back or keeps us from victory it's how we view God in the midst of facing it!Stop wasting your time and energy trying figure things out and put them in place, chances are you're wrong anyway! You don't have to have it all figured out because God already does, that's why it's called faith. He'll reveal to you exactly what you need and when you need it.

"Be still and know that I am God" such a simple verse but one that can have such great impact if we can learn to rest in it regardless of what we are going through.

There are no limits to what God can do. No limits to his power.There are no limits to his saving grace.So stop focusing on how big your trial is and start trusting how much Bigger God is!


Prayer starter: Dear God, I may not understand what I'm going through, it may look impossible or endless and I may be exhausted and ready to give up at times but help me know that you are so much greater than what I'm facing. Help me to focus my mind and my heart on just how powerful you are instead of on how big my circumstances appear to be.Nothing is impossible for you.

Behind the Scenes

"Wait for the Lord;

    be strong, and let your heart take courage;

    wait for the Lord"

psalm 27:14

Wait. That word alone evokes all kinds of unwanted feelings doesn't it? We don't like to wait. For anything. We want what we want and we want it NOW. Waiting requires the one thing that makes our face twist into a very unattractive cringe... Patience.

We went to eat the other night for my aunt's birthday. Now there's a strange fact about me. Most people probably don't do this but I like to look in the kitchen of a restaurant. I'm not saying I sneak in there like some food creeper I just mean if it's one you can see into the kitchen from where you're sitting, I always look.

It's not because I'm worried about them spitting in my food (not really) it's because I like to see behind the scenes.

When I look around at the people carrying on their conversations I realize they have no idea how hard the people in the kitchen are working to prepare their food just right for them. Some of them get anxious, annoyed, or even rude waiting for their food.I'm sure you've never done that;)

How often do we do the same thing with God? We pray for something and have faith it will come but then when it doesn't come right when we hope or expect we start to lose patience. We start doubting it's ever going to come. We start getting anxious and frustrated wondering what's taking so long.

It's so easy to forget that we can't see the whole picture.We think we have it all figured out how we think it should go.We are so hungry for what we're craving that we feel nothing but disappointment when it doesn't come. It often feels like God isn't "doing his job"...at least not the way we'd like. Like somehow he's there to serve us.Wrong.

The truth is God is always working. HIS way.For HIS Glory. He doesn't take a break. He's not purposely trying to hold something from you to be mean, he knows how much it means...better than even you do.

He's making things happen for you. Even when you can't see it, even when you don't feel it, even when it's not evident. He's working on your prayers. because we know he has a much bigger and better plan than we could ever imagine. Don't give up.

One thing I have learned is that God works on you while you wait. He's building your faith, strengthening your character, developing your perseverance.Those are things that last a lifetime.

I don't know what it is you've been praying for. Maybe a loved one, a financial situation, healing. In our family it's been health and a baby. I can't tell you how many times Jeremy and I both have been heart broken when it hasn't happened how we hoped. But if we say we trust God that means trusting his timing. As hard as that can be.

Only he can see the Big picture.He knows what's best and we can have faith that even though we can't see it he's working behind the scenes.He's getting everything just right, making sure no components are missing and in the right time He'll answer and it will be better than you ever hoped for!



Prayer Starter: God I feel like I've exhausted myself praying for the same thing for so long now. Help give me rest and peace knowing you're working behind the scenes even when I can't see it. I might not understand what you're doing but help me to trust in your timing.No matter how long it's been I know nothing is impossible for you.

God's skilled to handle the skillets.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. 

In this world you will have trouble. 

But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Life sure can be unexpected and painful sometimes can't it?

The other morning I was getting some stuff done around the house and it was going good...until I was putting dishes away.We have a hanging rack in our kitchen that the pots and pans hang from.

On my tippy toes I reached to hook one of the skillets. It looked like it was hooked so I looked away, it felt like it was on good so I let go....Can you guess what happened next? Yep.

Skillet came shooting straight down making direct contact with the top of my dome.

Unexpected? YES. Painful? Absofrigginlutely.

I had no choice but to fall to me knees. I grabbed my head and tried to keep myself from face planting straight into the tile.

All I kept picturing was the cartoons where the character gets hit in the head with a skillet and their eyes bug out and a huge knot rockets up from their noggin. I was convinced I'd look over at the skillet and see an Amber's head sized indention in it.

A painful experience I could have done without but isn't that just life?

We can be going along just fine and then BAM... skillet to the skull! Maybe a loved one gets sick, you get an unexpected bill in the mail, a friend hurts you, you receive bad news from the doctor.The list goes on.

The truth is painful situations are going to come just like this verse says.It doesn't say 'you may have trouble' or 'there's a very good chance you'll have trouble.' Nope, it says 'you WILL have trouble.'

Jesus knew how hard this world would be. He knew the pain, the struggles,the temptations, the heartache.He experienced it all.

Knowing trials are coming may not make them any easier to handle when they get here. We're still human, we still react on emotions.But the thing is, we don't have to handle them!

The peace Jesus is referring to in this verse is the peace that He wants us to have in him and him alone not in circumstances that can change. And the reason we can have that peace no matter what happens is because everything we face or could ever face he has already overcome on the cross!

That sickness, He already overcame. That financial struggle, He already overcame. That diagnosis your loved one just got, He already overcame. That hurtful relationship, He already overcame. That fear, He already overcame. That worry, He already overcame. That past hurt, He already overcame. That future struggle, He already overcame!

Don't you see? What Jesus did on the cross covered it ALL. Not some, ALL. Jesus isn't thrown off by the unexpected and painful things that come our way. He hurts with us but he's not worried about it because he's already taken care of it. That's why he says we can have peace. He's got it. All of it. Let Him handle it.He's way more capable anyway.

Whatever painful situation you are in or that may come your way know it's already covered by grace. FREELY given grace.

So when life hurts, just hit your knees and trust that God is skilled to handle the skillets!

Prayer Starter: God I'm hurting. I never saw this coming. It's painful and scary. I don't know how to handle it so help me give it over to you. Help me to focus on the power of the cross instead of my circumstances.Remind me that Jesus overcame anything I am and will ever face and give me peace in that. Thank you for sending your son to die on a cross for me so that I could have hope in a hurting world.

One of THOSE days...

"God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,
    his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
They’re created new every morning.
    How great your faithfulness!
I’m sticking with God.
    He’s all I’ve got left."

Lamentations 3:23 (MSG)

You ever have one of those days?

You stub your toe.You wash your phone in the washing machine.You search for your car keys for an hour only to realize they mysteriously ended up behind the eggs in the fridge.Your car battery dies.You get a bill in the mail.You step in dog poop. Some thief steals your parking spot.

I'm sure if you have kids you can add about 50 million and one things to that list.

Days where your emotions run so rampant that you literally cry over spilled milk.

You feel like God must have skipped over you when He was handing out mercy portions that morning.

All you keep thinking is "I can't wait for this day to be over!"

It's one thing after another, like a domino effect. And not the kind that's cool to watch either.

And by the end of it you're surprised you survived. That the pets survived.That your children survived.

I hate to break it to you but "bad days" like that are going to continue to happen. That's life. We can't really change that. We can however change the way we look at them.

A bad day doesn't mean a bad life. God has enough mercy to cover anything that happens.Yes, ANYTHING. You may be beating yourself up for the way you handled a situation or two that day but LET IT GO.

So you kicked the cat, it's still alive right? Besides it's a cat, it probably deserved it.I'm kidding....sort of.

You can't change the fact that unfortunate stuff happened or the way you may have handled it but you can learn from it and move on to a new day.More often than not you'll look back and realize the "bad" stuff wasn't really that "bad". And the mercy you thought was missing was there all along, keeping things from being even worse.

God's love and mercy doesn't run out when our energy and patience does. I LOVE that about Him!You can rest in the fact that God will have new, fresh mercy for you in the morning and every morning after that.  Not because we deserve it but because He's faithful. The circumstances that may happen throughout the day don't change that, no matter how "bad" they seem!

Prayer Starter: God I know frustrating things are going to happen in life. Help me start my morning focusing on your faithfulness and mercy. Keep me mindful throughout the day of who you are and your ability to handle whatever comes my way. I know I'll screw up but help me remember your mercy isn't based on my actions but on your unfailing love.Thank you for new days and fresh starts.