Thursday, November 28, 2013

Pumpkin pie doesn't love me...



Thanksgiving food.

Those two words make your mouth water don't they? If not there's something wrong with you. Just saying.

I love Thanksgiving, I always have. I remember that day would come and I'd wake up to the glorious smells coming from the kitchen.You know the ones. I couldn't wait to pig out with my family and fall asleep on the couch. What thanksgiving is about right? Year after year I became so comfortable in that. Looking forward to that constancy. Knowing it would always be there, the same thing, just the way I loved it...every November.That special meal...That one you can have any day of the year but something about having it just on Thanksgiving day makes it more special, more amazingly delicious.

All things change though don't they? At least in some way.Thanksgivings have changed some over the last few years in our family. Extended families, coming and going, living in different states.

It also changed since I started to get sick a few years ago. There's certain foods I can't enjoy anymore, not the way I used to anyway.The pumpkin pie, the cheesy broccoli, the melt in your mouth yeast rolls... My three favorite things since I was a little butterball myself. The things I never thought twice about shoveling into my mouth I now cant enjoy the same way anymore. Without having a reaction to anyway. Stomach pains, muscle flareups, burning skin, just a few of the strange symptoms I get from eating certain foods. I never realized how much I took food for granted.

I have to admit the first year was hard, really hard knowing those foods I looked forward to and had become so accustomed to eating I wouldn't be able to anymore. My mom pulled out all the stops to make as close to everything as possible and it was amazing don't get me wrong, my mindset wasn't right though.There was still disappointment because that often happens with change doesn't it?

This year I'm actually thankful to be sick for Thanksgiving. No I haven't lost my mind....well not all the way. I'm thankful because it's the swift kick in the thanksgiving stretchy pants that I needed. It shifts my focus back to what's really important. It's not the food. Shocker I know. I'm not saying enjoying the food is a bad thing, it's not. But it shouldn't be the main focus.

Being sick actually makes me stop and think about the things I do have instead of what I don't. Crazy how that works. So this Thanksgiving I can't have regular pumpkin pie or broccoli so covered in cheese it makes it not healthy anymore. At least I can eat. At least I have food. So many people are so less fortunate than that.

And it reminds me the REAL reason why I love Thanksgiving, why I realize I've always loved Thanksgiving. Despite what may be different about the day, one thing has remained the same.  It's not because of what I'm eating but because the people I get to share it with.

I love everything about the day. I love seeing my mom in the kitchen selflessly cooking like she always has since the day I couldn't see over the counter. I love seeing my dad running around cracking jokes and trying to help but still stay out of my mom's way. I love seeing my beautiful sisters and their sweet husbands because no matter what distance separates us or how old we get it's like no time has passed.

I love looking over at my husband who said he'd be fine to have "Just one more roll" but is now passed out on my parents couch in a bread coma. Yes, I sure did call you out Jeremy Roth.

I love my family. We may look at things differently sometimes or had our disagreements over the years but I have never lacked love from them. I have that this Thanksgiving and I've had that every Thanksgiving before this. No matter what things change, that never does. I need to appreciate the people in my life more, not just on Thanksgiving but every day. Anything I don't or can't have doesn't compare to everything I do have. A love that never fades. God's love. His unconditional love shown through the people in my life. Let's face it, as much as I LOVE me some Pumpkin pie it's never loved me back.










Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Why Beauty Sucks


Beauty Sucks...

     We've all heard the statement Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.Something someone sees as beautiful someone else may see as not.



What is Beauty anyway? Real Beauty?


     We all have at least that one thing...that thing our eyes narrow in on when we stand in front of the mirror.That thing we wish we could change or try to cover up, convincing ourselves we'd be more beautiful, more desirable if we did. But by whose standards? Usually our own based on what society has drilled into our brains is "Beautiful". The magazines,commercials, billboards all portray ideas of what beauty is. If you wear this...you'll be beautiful. If you have this... then you'll be beautiful. If you look like this...you're beautiful....Trust me, as a photographer I know just what photo shop can do for a person...     
     
    
    Even at a young age girls are already striving to 'look prettier'. Desperately wanting approval and thinking they have to change who they are to be beautiful, to be accepted. Society and the media play on our insecurities. THAT is why Beauty sucks. Society's definition of Beauty. It sucks the life out of us, using all our energy and resources to reach the standards society has set for Beauty. But are they really to blame?



    We are so often our own worst critics aren't we? We look at ourselves so critically seeing ourselves one way and thinking others see the same. You know what I've learned is that most of the time the way we think people see us isn't at all how they do. The people that matter anyway. And at the end of the day how others see us isn't nearly as important as how we see ourselves.There are people in my life who I look at and I'm just amazed by.I see nothing but incredible beauty when I look at them and yet I know there are insecurities they deal with all the time.Things that make them see themselves as anything but the beautiful treasure they are.It breaks my heart because what they see as flaws to be fixed I see as beauty to be cherished. How can they possibly see themselves as anything but Beautiful? And then I think how often I've done the same thing to myself, Time and time again.



    Insecurities are a tricky thing. Sometimes we joke about them, try to deny them, or just try to hide them. We think our imperfections already stick out like a sore thumb so the last thing we want is to draw attention to them. We look at others thinking if I only had that body, that hair, that face I'd be happy...Id feel beautiful. All the while having no idea what insecurities that person faces themselves. Because lets face it, we all have them. I can promise you even the most confident woman has something about herself she struggles with. Comparison will steal our joy and our confidence every time. We so often base our worth on what we perceive to be true. Spending so much time focusing on our flaws that we miss embracing the things that make us one of a kind. 


     I think about the way God sees us. How he made us each so uniquely different with nothing but BEAUTY in mind. Knowing exactly how we'd look, right now, in this moment. He loves every single thing about us. Especially that thing you despise. You see, the truth is GOD DOESN'T MAKE JUNK. He doesn't mess up. He didn't make a mistake when he made your ears stick out a little more or your toes a little longer than every one else's.(me;) That makes you, YOU. No one else like you in the entire world. You're imperfections aren't something to be despised, they're things to be embraced. They make you rare, they make you Unique....and so Beautiful.

     Let's be real though, sadly there will always be people who try to bring you down. Most of the time to make themselves feel better. Often times hurt people want to hurt other people. So that person you come across that wants to point out your flaws is probably just facing insecurities of their own. Just smile and shake them off. You're fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator of the universe.You ARE Beautiful. Women need so desperately to hear and believe that, especially today. In a world where it's so important for us to set an example for the younger generations. To not just tell them but show them that they're beautiful just how they are.That there are people out there that will see them as a beauty to be cherished and they're worth waiting for. We all want to feel beautiful.So let's let go and focus on the things we do like rather than the things we don't.Let's try to see ourselves the way God does and help others to do the same.

It's time to embrace our imperfections...